Relationship with my wife.


In our relationship my wife and i are no sheep, right from the beginning. We didn't get together after dating for a while, but after becoming friends on an internet forum. When we fell in love we both had a very strong desire to get together. This wasn't that easy as my wife lived in England and i lived in the Netherlands. A ferry crossing was booked for me to go to England but on the day before my crossing there was a storm that forced all ferries to stay docked waiting for the storm to calm down. On the day of my crossing i still wasn't sure wether the ferries would sail across, but i was determined to go, even if i had to go all the way to France to travel by train through the tunnel between France and England. Nothing could stop me. Fortunatly the ferries did sail and i arrived at my future wife's home as planned, and from that day on we have not been away from each other for one full day. When i'm working i'm away from home of course, but never any longer then necessary. If at work they would ask me to do a job far from home which would make hotel staying necessary, i would refuse it. At the moment my wife and i are watching Survivor, a game where a group of people are playing a game on a remote place far from home for 39 days. The person who wins this game can win a million dollars. For me the choice wouldn't be difficult, winning a million or be with my wife, without hesitation i choose to be with my wife. She is the person i want to spend the rest of my life with. She is the most wonderfull, kind, considerate, loving, sexy, smart, wise, intelligent, amazing woman in the world. And i am the most fortunate man in the world for my wife wants me as her partner.

A very important part of our relationship is that we are best friends. Best friends hang out with each other, share thoughts with each other and express their feelings to each other. Our relationship is unique, it is ours alone. Not something we learned out of books or from websites, not something copied from others. Not conventional nor conforming. And it couldn't be any different, as we both are no sheeples.

December madness 2.

In the previous blogpost i wrote about the sheeplike behaviour of people regarding the christmas holidays. If you think of it, this christmas madness is not just there, it's forced upon people. Getting closer to the last week of december you can't leave your house without being confronted with it. And staying at home is maybe even worse when listening to the radio or watching tv, not to mention being on the internet, especially without an ad blocker.

This is not a rant, it's an observation. This christmas madness just makes me shake my head when i wonder why?

December madness.

I wonder what drives people into this december madness, and i mean the christmas holidays. My parents went along with it too, especially my mother. Sending lots of christmas cards to relatives and hanging all the received cards on a string on the wall. I'm sure some of the received cards were exactly the same as the ones my mother had send. If you think of it, sending a piece of cardboard with a romantic picture on it only to receive the same pieces of cardboard again. Because one has to do this.

Then the holidays themselves. This requires a lot of shopping, and in the case of the two christmas days falling on a monday and tuesday, an enormously amount of shopping has to be done. Then the parking lots of the supermarkets are too small in the two days before the holidays. Houses need to be decorated too of course.

There is nothing wrong with decorating the house and have a feast, with or without presents. But why can this only be done at christmas? Why not pick a random date on the calander and do this? Why be afraid that people say that you're odd for doing so? Why be a sheep? 

Pink.

I can't remember where i got the idea from that pink is for girls and blue for boys. Thinking back to the seventies when i grew up, and seeing old photos of that time, colors were bright and plentyfull. The color pink was not fashionable then i guess as it doesn't show up much on photos of the seventies. But as an adult man buying clothes or other things i needed in life i never bought something in pink, as i did have it stuck in my mind that pink was only for girls.

But when thinking of it, it is just silly. How can a color be only male or female? It's just a color. And it's not proven that only/all female human beings like pink and male human beings like any color except pink. Pink is for girls and blue for boys is nothing more then conditioning, and it seems that marketing plays a big role in it. In the same line marketing is conditioning little girls into the role of mother and housewife. Just look in any toyshop or look in any toy brochure. As if there is no free choice.

Human beings have a brain that can think and reason in an independant way. Human beings don't need to be told what choices to make, they can do that themselves. But i wonder how many are actually really making their own choices. The choice of being a sheep or not.

Bikers

Not long after i got my drivers license for driving a car, i also got my drivers license for riding a motorcycle. Shortly after that i bought a motorbike, a not so old second hand 600cc bike. Soon i grew an interest in old bikes from the seventies but mainly to ride them, not to work on them to make them better or to restore them. None of my bikes were 100% original, i liked bikes that were a bit different. At first i wore a full face helmet which i thought was not so practical when wearing glasses. So later i bought an open face helmet which was much more practical. I wore an old leather jacket which i had since i was sixteen years old. I also had thin leather pants which were later abandoned for warmer thicker pants. If it was warm in summer i wore jeans.

Sometimes when i was wearing jeans some other biker in a full leather suit with protection would point out to me that riding in jeans was not safe. I always ignored them. They were right on one point, when falling at speed and sliding over rough tarmac a full leather suit with protection keeps your skin better protected then jeans. But it was my choice to wear jeans and take the risk, i did not need someone else to tell me i was wrong/stupid.

When riding old bikes the electric system isn't always as good as on modern bikes, so on bright clear days i was riding without my lights on. The only (light) accident i had in twenty years was when i had my lights on. What saved me was anticipating on possible dangers and i had time to brake before hitting a car whose owner didn't see me. As with the jeans other bikers would point out to me that my lights were not on while riding, even on bright sunny days. Again it is my choice, and from my own experience i can say that having lights on doesn't save you from accidents, attentive and sensible drivers will save you, and anticipating driving yourself. Ask an ambulance driver who drives the best visible brightly colored car you can imagine how many near misses and accidents they have.

While bikers can be so proud of their individuality, from my own experience i can say that the biker world is made of sheeples. I was one of them. Riding a custom made chopper wearing the "biker" outfit going to biker meetings doesn't make a person an independant individual. You're going to meet people who do just the same as you, want to look the same as the others, and talk the same talk as everyone else. Even if someone belongs to a group where everyone rides a bike that they like, and are not trying to fit in by riding a certain type of bike, it doesn't make a person an independant individual.



 

11 november.

Here in the Netherlands and in some other parts of Europe, is a tradition called "Sint Maarten/Martinus" on 11 november. Not everywhere this tradition is done the same, but it mainly involves children begging for candy. Children make a lantern themselves, or their parents buy them one, and with that lantern alight the children go from door to door, sing a song, and expect to get candy for it. It is not known with certainty where this tradition comes from. 

As a child i went from door to door with a lantern singing a song and expected candy for it. I can't remember whether i have asked my parents why we did this, and not knowing myself why it was done or where it came from, i wonder if my parents knew anything about it. (Just now i looked it up on the internet) If i had children before i had internet, and my children were asking about it, i couldn't have given them answers. 'It's just what we do on 11 november'.

When a tradition has no meaning or even a history (the tradition seems fairly recent) then it's nothing more then sheep behaviour.

Nachman

You chose us when you decided to take a nap on my lap,
then welcomed your new home with a lot of noise.
You needed a lot of attention, and toilet trips,
made us lose out on sleep at night.

But you were very precise on your toilet trips,
never made one misstake.
Your appetite was huge and you liked everything edible,
as long as it wasn't mushrooms.

You grew fast and had so much potential,
but somehow you weren't able to learn.
Got friends with the cats,
could get cross at the playfull Boxer.

You were nervous and didn't like sudden noises,
maybe it's his Catahoula nature.
You were friendly towards us,
but didn't really liked to cuddle.

Then you became strange,
suddenly didn't recognise the cats.
When being afraid you chose to hide away,
instead of coming to us to feel safe.

We gave you the best life you could have,
as a dog with Hydrocephalus.
You just became two years old,
when you ended your life with a lot of noise